Law School, i.e. Waiting and Uncertainty...

As an undergraduate student intern I went to meetings with people struggling with addictions. To begin, we introduced ourselves with our name, the substance we wanted to overcome, and how long since our last use.
I participated and chose to refer to my drug of choice as “control.” However, I could never say I stopped my management tendencies for very long. Planning and regulating still seem to be my natural inclination.

Family--getting married and having kids--is supposed to be the divine process of perfecting oneself. So here I am, trying to apply the idea of “letting-go” to the course our life takes as we chose a law school and prepare to move.

The waiting phase during February and March went surprisingly smoothly for me. The first wave of letters came quickly with some reassuring acceptances. Then the last notifications trickled in slowly with a few more positive offers, and the waitlists and rejections. There was one afternoon when we expected the letter from BYU and stalked the postman through the parking lots of our apartment complex. Otherwise, I did fairly well at being patient. The trip to Chicago over spring break helped us hone in on our criteria and eliminate some schools from the running. We said our prayers, deliberated and responded to our preferred schools by the decision days.

So here it is: Ave Maria School of Law is a fairly new, medium-sized law school in Ann Arbor, Michigan. It seems to have excellent and committed faculty. It attracts students who are interested in applying principles of morality and natural law to our established systems. The students we met were very down-to-earth and friendly but also involved with their education. They also display a very family friendly atmosphere. A CES institute class is available at the law school along with the regular Catholic masses. Jared hopes to be able to take advantage of academic leadership opportunities. Next summer the campus will move to the Fort Myers/ Naples area of Florida. Check out the website if you wish. www.avemarialaw.edu

Here is the entry from my journal I wrote about three weeks ago about law school.
"I want to feel confident that we are choosing a law school based on answer to prayer and not just reason and a good feeling--or is that the same thing!
I might like an amazing experience to tell others about our decision, Yet while writing this I know I feel very strongly in my excitement and surety or peace that this is the place for us in the next years.
I want to do it not only for our benefit but I want to believe in the school enough to contribute to its promising development. I want to build contacts with people that are life changing in every aspect. I want to form our family as a unit that values learning, closeness, and the Spirit. And I want to begin on our certain future course as a family with Jared's work and my contributions.
This is my prayer of faith and hope, that we may find its fulfillment."

So here is our leap into another stage of life. Another step in my process of mastery, or was that letting-go....

Michael's and Jordan’s constant party

This is a catchup post..., and I guess I'll recount some of the fun things Michael and Jordan have been doing.

This is Aiden and the boys at our house. He came over to "play" every day during the school year while his mom went to class. Lots of fun!

This is the only USU sports event we made it to. The boys got to watch gymnastics, run around, and shake hands with the Aggie bull mascot.

We went downtown to the 2008 primary theme exhibit at the Church History museum. Riding on TRAX to temple square was our "adventure."

These are two of Michael's favorite girls, Carli and Kimi. He says they are "cute girls" and they live too far away. We got to see them in April.

This is Aunt Rachel in action with the boys at the Fun Center. She came to Logan to see us!!

Michael's friend Hillel invited us to go bowling for his birthday party.

We had an amazing passover feast with Hillel, Noam, Dorit and Yan Landau.

Spring cookouts at the Clarks are great.

The boys are really enjoying both of their new cousins, Becca and Ella.
These are three monkeys and some fun elephants at the Hogle Zoo. (Cousin Tyler is fun too.)

Aunt Renee and Uncle Ben are the best! --While I got to hold baby Ella :)

Our family blog site should probably be called "Michael and Jordan's fun times" or else "Candace's musings."
The musings are unavoidable.... So, here is my disclaimer. Lately, I feel like I am the entertainer or family activity planner. Every once in a while I realize I need to work out of that role and create a new balance.
It seems like we try to have a certain quota of fun everyday and then I can expect to take time for other projects at home when I don't need to entertain the boys.

My new goal however is to use our time better whether it is work or play time.

Elder Ballard talked in conference about not overscheduling our families. "Families need unstructured time when relationships can deepen and real parenting can take place. Take time to listen, to laugh, and to play together."
He quoted an author Anna Quindlen who said, "I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less."

We'll see how this goes. --to make our focus more on each other and not just on the outing or party. --quality and not quantity.

Spring in Logan--Musings

This photo is from early March. Now we have fields of white dandelions (and grass) to replace the snow.

Before spring break in March we had accumulated 10 foot plus snow drifts in front of our apartment. We left for a week and a half and came back to patches of grass showing through. That was how our spring roller-coaster began. Spring in Logan is one of our favorite seasons, even though the weather was back and forth so much this year.

About that time in March, I was realizing that we had been here for over a year now and we're starting to repeat seasons. We've come a long way! We'll enjoy summer in June and July before we move away. Yesterday we visited some favorite spots in Logan canyon and started to appreciate the things we will miss when we move.

It has been a great place to live--with great memories in every season.

Pictures--priceless or pricey??

Here are a few new photos from Spring in Northern Utah.
It is wonderful to capture and relive memories with photographs.
After our Chicago trip I thought our digital photo files had somehow been destroyed or lost. I was devastated, then elated to retrieve them later.
I am still so sad when I think of my trip to Bryansk, Russia with a broken camera. Then the roll of film with the first moments of Michael's life was nearly exposed and ruined....
So, pictures are definitely priceless.
But, when you have too many they become a curse.
I am trying to find a balance as I work on scrapbooks for Michael, Jordan and our family. We have three huge boxes full of albums. Do I really want to create more?
I would really like to collect less stuff.
I am always a little behind the new technology. I imagine I will catch up with digital scrapbooking soon. But it doesn't quite have the same effect as flipping pages in a memory book. So by the time I have time to work on it I hope I'll have it figured out.
In the meantime, I keep taking lots of photos....

CHICAGO

Here are a few photos from our spring break trip!
Jenny was our hostess. We saw nine law schools, and a few sights in the "windy city."
March turned out to be kind of a whirlwind --livening up our quiet routine at home in Logan. We have needed a family trip for a long time. As soon as we found out that one of the schools would pay for Jared to come visit, I started planning a trip with a fury. It took the few weeks before spring break for me to prepare for leaving Michael and Jordan. Then the week after to get back on track at home. It was a real blessing to know the boys wouldn't miss us while they were spoiled by grandmas and aunts back in Utah.
We are feeling more and more ready to make the leap into law school and out of Logan at the end of the summer.

SHOES

I love shoes and have always loved shoes. I don't have a lot of favorites or things I enjoy just for the sake of enjoyment, so I gladly claim and recognize my love of shoes.
I remember a few special pair of sneakers I wore in grade school, and several monk-strap style Sunday shoes I chose throughout the years.
I admit that there have been a few times when my closet contained too many pair of shoes. I have a hard time discarding even old or out-of-style ones. Having a few sisters and a mom with my same shoe size helps in collecting hand-me-downs. There are shoes for every occasion (sometimes for that occasion that never happens, but I have to keep the shoe in case).
I have done well in the past few years to keep a minimal and modest shoe inventory. --mostly comprised of a pair of Mommy-shoes or everyday loafer type.
Last week I enjoyed replacing my old pair of Mommy-shoes with a new pair and having an occasion to wear some non-Mommy ones as well. The shoe fettish lives on.

Michael is growing up.

I am learning that I am a mom who enjoys spending time with my kids when they function somewhat independently. This will probably come across sounding naive. But I do know that it is more difficult for me to spend time cradling and feeding a baby, than to talk with, understand, and cheer my children on.

Today was one of the more emotion-oriented payoff days for the nitty-gritty of daily care-taking. I am enjoying working together with Michael as he spreads his wings.

Here are some of his more recent accomplishments and landmarks:

• Michael is more or less potty trained.
• He swims by himself--with a life vest (not clinging to Mom or Dad).
• He rides a bike by himself--with training wheels.
• He has a verified crush on the neighbor girl.
• He has learned to communicate well enough to negotiate...He doesn't stop talking....

He is our loveable superhero!
Thank goodness those moments of gratitude come to help us continue forward.